Endorphin Fairy – The Dust Up

Endorphin Fairy

The Dust Up

Histrionic

I have this friend, well ex-friend now…. First person of this type I have ever come across in my life, and I come across a lot of people.

Initial impressions were very good.  Here was a woman who I got along with, was seemingly a good person, had her shit together and we had some really good times.

Some three years into the friendship I had to cut all ties with her.  I believe she is suffering from Histrionic Personality Disorder.  Of course I am no psychologist and she will never be diagnosed with this, as that is part of the disorder, not recognising there is anything wrong with your behaviour.

There are so many incidences of poor behaviour when I look back now and I have given myself a damn good talking to about ignoring the signs and getting sucked in to her world.

She has been separated for about 5 years now and has 3 children.  The eldest of them no longer lives with her and rarely visits (he’s now 15).  He instead lives full time with his father because he no longer wanted to be exposed to his Mother’s highly inappropriate behaviour and lack of morals.   She has an obsession with men that is beyond compare.  Her every waking breathing moment is all about finding the perfect man for her.  A man who ticks all her boxes – yes she has several points that a man needs to meet to be worthy of her.  She is addicted to online dating sites and by her own admission has been on over 300 dates from POF alone, often more than one in the same day, I know this to be fact.  She truly believes that she is a great catch and honestly does not understand why men never hang around for her.  She is convinced that if you don’t have sex for 4 or 5 days you lose your libido (more on this later…..), she is also of the opinion that she gives the best oral sex these men have ever had.  95% of the time, if the man is a ‘potential’ as she calls them, she will at least give them head and most times have sex with them because she believes that this is how you keep a man coming back.  This can be in her car, at her house where she has met many men for the first time at her front door, sometimes with her children in the house, in the toilets at a venue (she admitted to giving a man a BJ in the male toilets after knowing him for 30 mins and while she was doing that his friends stole money out of her purse)

I need to point out that initially she does not come across as the slut she is.  She constantly talks about being a respectable woman with morals and she won’t settle

This is a woman who leaves her children at home alone at night for a few hours at a time so she could go out and ‘socialise’. She only has her children with her for 3 or 4 days at a time on alternate weeks.  She can’t even spend that small amount of time with them without having to get out.  Her version of socialising is going out on the hunt for cock.  She has a great need for attention and wants to be seen.  Looking for her knight in shining armour, a man who has money to support her so she doesn’t have to work and can loll about all day having coffee with friends, hiring a cleaner, cook and personal trainer.  This man will also be satisfied to sit at home when he is not working to await her presence.  He will not be allowed to have his own life or interests, and going out with the boys to maintain his friendships is absolutely out of the question.  She will be his entire world from now on, when she deigns to grace him with her presence after she is done with her socialising and telling everyone how fucking awesome she is and has a man who is besotted with her.

She rates herself very highly in her group.  When you are out with her, she views herself as cream of the crop and the friends she is with at the time are just bystanders, no one will second glance them surely…… When this inevitably doesn’t go to her plan or liking (she’s average looking at best), the tantrums begin.  She starts bitching about any man in the venue who is not paying attention to her and god forbid they are paying attention to some of her friends while she is ignored.  She starts to pull out a few tired old cards of hers – Such as dancing on a podium or in the most attention gaining spot in the place.  And believe me when I say her dancing style attracts all the wrong sort of attention, think stripper on an imaginary pole and imitating giving imaginary head jobs.  Did I mention she is 47 years old??  Dresses like a 20 year old skank and wears gimmicky items like hats (omg the fucking hats….  :/) fishnets, crotchless undies, etc.  This is just on a normal night out, not costume party or hens night.  It extends to a simple coffee with the fucking hats.  If you disagree with her negative comments towards any man in the place that hasn’t paid her attention you then get the silent treatment for a week.  If she believes you have ‘cut her grass’ because a man who she had her eye on starts engaging with you instead of her, she will either accuse you of cutting her grass, start laying down rules about ‘pegging’ men when you walk into a venue and no one is allowed to speak to these men or cracks the shits and goes home.

On occasion when we have been chatting normally to a group of men, general nice conversation, she has pulled me aside and demanded to know who I am going to ‘go for’ and puts me under pressure to initiate immediately. I generally haven’t even got to that stage and not thinking along those lines yet. And I’m a little more traditional and will wait for cues from said man. She does this generally when men are perhaps showing more interest in me than her and basically says to me – If you’re not going to fuck this guy, I will. What she doesn’t understand is that it’s not her decision. If he is into you then he is and all good, if he’s not….it won’t happen. She is under the assumption that ALL men are immediately attracted to her and she just has to click her fingers and she will have them. It’s just so narcissistic and leaves me incredulous most of the time. She assumes that no man would perhaps prefer one of her friends over her…. and if she actually occasionally twigs that they do prefer one of her friends over her, she then starts picking fault with the man and saying not her type anyway, etc. etc. She has also said to me in the past, ‘It’s ok, I’ll back off on this one to give you a go.’     Can you believe that shit???

Since disassociating myself with her I have heard even more stuff about her that is just disgusting. Her reputation is terrible and I am so very glad I am no longer seen with her. She has had quite a few other friends drop off in the last few months also. We have all seen the light. And I can tell you that every one of us has such a sense of relief and a shedding of negativity once getting away from her. You just don’t see it when you are wrapped up in her extremely toxic world. A huge weight off my shoulders I can tell you and have been so positive and happy since because I am not being dragged down into the sewer of her life.

There is a lot more I could go into but this is just a brief overview of what has happened.

Do you have someone like this in your life? Maybe you do and haven’t recognised it yet. Or if you have gotten away from someone as toxic as this, you will understand where I’m coming from..

#histrionic

#Bekindtoeachother

#EF

#endorphinfairy

 

Broken relationships and the raw deal.

I don’t believe in one partner for life. It doesn’t work. It’s not human nature, it’s a societal fabrication to maintain order and a sense of purpose.  But of course this is just my opinion.

The essential essence of a person doesn’t change, but circumstances and influences do. If you can adjust to these factors in line with your partner then you are doing extremely well.  What a lot of people fail to realise is that NO relationship is perfect. NO life is perfect. Perfection doesn’t exist.  Humans are very fallible.  In the current times the realisation of this makes things far too hard and people give up easily. Disposable society, ease of access to other potentials and the cbf attitude re trying to repair relationships and put in the effort to save something that very well may be totally worth it.  The majority of times, the grass is not greener on the other side folks.

Human males are unique in that they do invest in their offspring. That doesn’t mean their instincts aren’t screaming at them to spread their genes though. Society makes this difficult and immoral because human children require lengthy rearing support and resources in today’s world. Human females generally have the urge to procreate and the expectations of having support from a partner – whether he is still around or not – are a given. They are law.  I think most of the time men step up to this, even in the most adverse situations.  Adverse situations being access to children being lorded over them by their ex.  The old, if you don’t give me this or do this I won’t allow you to see your children, and I will poison their minds against you.  So for the sake of their children and because they LOVE their children they concede to demands by out of control women.  Sometimes no matter what they do, it won’t be enough and the ex is simply determined to destroy them and a relationship with their children that they have every much a right as the mother to nurture and enjoy.  These fathers LOVE their children, how dare mothers manipulate the situation and circumstances out of plain spite.  Do the women that do this ever stop and pause and think about what this is actually doing to their children?  Every child needs a mother and a father.  Their development and view of how things should be is based on this.  No wonder so many young adults are now having issues with being able to cope in the world……because their whole upbringing was marred with vexatious, projected opinions and a lot of falsehoods tearing down the most prominent male in their life that they have many skills for survival in the world to learn from.

I am not talking about domestic violence situations, that is a completely different scenario. The majority of which are perpetrated by men, but women are not completely excluded of engaging in this also.  But the majority of brainwashing of children against their fathers WITH NO VALID REASON is perpetrated by women.  Simply because they are bitter, jealous and feel like failures when a relationship has broken down.  It takes two…..you can’t lay all the blame on one party.

Mothers are pretty much given the green light and all the advantages in broken relationships.  Fathers have to fight tooth and nail to get any concessions, quite often dealing with threats and fabrication at the same time.  And the courts will most always side with the mother, unless presented with undeniable proof to the contrary.

I know of less than a handful of relationships that have broken down where the parents manage beautifully.  They are still friends and you won’t hear them criticizing the other parent, and never in front of their children.  The children feel secure and loved by all and can see by example that even though the relationship didn’t work for Mum and Dad, it doesn’t mean either one is a bad person, it’s just life and happens sometimes.  These minority separated parents are doing the best thing for their children in the circumstances.  It shows them that things don’t always work out as you planned but you CAN cope and cope without causing more unnecessary hurt or trauma.  I don’t believe in staying together for the sake of the children.  They are not stupid and will sense and see you are not happy together.  You will not be showing them what a real, good and happy relationship should be like, their view of what a relationship should be like will be skewed and they will most likely be unsuccessful in their own future relationships.

So if you are a single woman out there and wondering why men won’t commit to you (especially the older generation) you can thank your crazy, nut busting sisters who have already burnt these men so badly that they won’t fall for it again.  Particularly men who already have children. They have left the mark of their progeny so no need to pander to another woman in order to spread their genes. Why would they put themselves through that kind of pain again?  Especially when society has changed so much and they can now have their cake and eat it.  Men can spot a clinger/bunny boiler a mile off and it is usually these type of women who have previously scorned men and have that permanent screw loose that are the loudest whiners about this.  Unfortunately these women don’t recognise this in themselves and again constantly blame and deride men for their own shortcomings.

To the men I say – Do what suits you.  If any of this sounds familiar to you, you’ve earned it.  Time to turn the tables.  You can even be outright honest about your intentions (or lack thereof) because these type of deluded women won’t believe you anyway haha….. they will assume they will be the ones to change your mind.  At least that way they can’t accuse you of lying to them when their deluded perception of their own attraction and power fails.

To the women I say – Take a good step back from yourself.  Look at your self from the outside with real scrutiny.  Men are not the lummoxes you think they are.  They can spot your facade a mile off and want none of it.  Stop with the manipulation and poisoning of young innocent minds.  It’s not all about you and contrary to your own popular belief – You are not ‘All That’.

 

Don’t Be An Arsehole……

A lot of backstabbing, underhandedness, two faced behaviour, selfishness, disregard, ugliness and plain old being mean has been going on around me of late.

It’s coming from everywhere… work life, home life, friend life. People I thought I could rely on, trust and be there when I truly needed them have gone MIA.

People seem to have such disregard for others. I think it has a lot to do with mental illness. I don’t suffer from mental illness. I often wonder why it is so prevalent these days. Some people use it as an excuse – yes you have been diagnosed and are getting treatment and good on you for that, but when you then treat people you supposedly value in your life badly, don’t use it as an excuse. You’re being an arsehole.

Then there are the ones that clearly need some help and treatment but refuse to admit that this is the case. These ones can be quite dangerous because they leave a trail of destruction behind them, sometimes deliberately, and then ignore it, act like nothing has happened and infact twist the situation to make it seem as though others are the ones that have the problem. Masters of manipulation and never take ownership of their mistakes, harm, lies and issues. You’re being an arsehole.

Others are seriously vengeful.  Crusaders…..mostly for themselves. They lie, manipulate and simply make shit up to suit their purpose. And they don’t give up. They are the type that will go to the enth degree to clear themselves of any wrong doing and blame anyone and everyone in the process. Except themselves. You’re being an arsehole.

If you need help get it. Take a look at your self and your behaviour and start there. Stop treating people like shit. If you actually want friends, then stop burning them. Be truthful, be honest, ask for help and if you can, reciprocate for someone. This will be your Karma. Don’t be an arsehole.

Narcissists. No, you are not better than everyone else. No, your standing in life is not as high as you imagine it is. No, everyone is not actually jealous of you.  No, people are not trying to imitate you or your life because it’s so amazing (not). No, you are nowhere near as smart as you think you are.  Yes, everyone thinks you’re a dick. Yes, everyone recognises that you think you’re superior even though you think you are hiding the smug so well. Yes, everyone knows you are faaaar from you self declared perfection. Yes, everyone takes great delight when you get shown up because you are not as good as you think you are. Narcissists are really annoying, arrogant dicks. Mix this one with a bit of mental illness and watch out….

People will only put up with so much. Some less than others, some more, but in the end you will have no one because of the way you have repeatedly treated them.

At the very least…..  #Bedecenttoeachother

#Don’tbeanarsehole

#EF

 

Aly is a plant

#Alyisaplant

Take very careful note.

Men getting a raw deal

I’m frustrated for men. Why do women tell them they ‘need to change’.  If you don’t like who they are as themselves, then go elsewhere.  And keep going elsewhere…you won’t find Mr. Perfect because the perfect human does not exist, and this includes you you moronic vagina.

Whinging feminists give me the shits. And how dare you presume to represent me. You want to be treated as an equal. An equal to who? To men? If that’s the case then do your fair friggin’ share. You don’t deserve to be treated as an equal if you are not putting in like an equal. Simply being a woman doesn’t automatically entitle you to shit.

If and when you do have a dip at doing your fair share to be treated as an equal, and it doesn’t work out for you because you simply don’t have the constitution for it, FFS don’t start whining and spitting out excuses and having a tantrum.  You’re just demeaning yourself and pissing off women who don’t want to be associated with that kind of behaviour.

 

GREETINGS

Welcome to my first post on The Dust Up.

Bear with me, I’m a newbie to blogging. I have wanted to set this up for awhile to get some shit off my chest. It’s my opinions, thoughts, take on things. I feel I can speak freely here. You can speak freely here……there are few boundaries, but I will not tolerate idiots. I encourage discussion and education – no one knows it all. I hope a few eyes can be opened to different perspectives.

I will probably be intermittent with this. Feverish at times and MIA at others, but I now have somewhere to go, to vent, to laugh, to be angry, to be frustrated, to joke and to get the tumblings of my mind spewed forth……… Sounds inviting yes?? Haha.

#bedecenttoeachother

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